New Perspective!

The meeting today went very well. My stomach was in knots leading up to the meeting and I was trying to do everything possible to make sure that I got there early so that I can reserve a "safe" seat that is not in the middle or at the front of the room as to not draw any attention to myself. When I got into the room the meeting had not started yet but at least I was able to find a seat close to the wall with some other people, and close to the food - those wings were delicious. Anyhow, I did feel a certain amount of nervousness and I did feel hot and was sweating a bit but I would say that my anxiety went no higher than a 7 on my anxiety scale.

The thing that I found very interesting today was how my supervisor behaved during our team meeting. This team meeting was the first we had with the new supervisor and I found it surprising that he admitted that he was not good at speaking in front of others and the whole time he kept to himself close to the back of the room. This is in stark contrast to our previous supervisor who loved to talk and was always very outgoing. I noticed that my supervisor got visibly nervous when he was put in the spot light and this experience completely altered the way I looked at my career.

I tend to have this image of what a "professional" is and this "professional" is not socially anxious in the least. However, my supervisor who has worked in many different departments and has achieved quite a lot for himself seemed, in all frankness, extremely shy. Witnessing my supervisor in this state allowed me to gain a better understanding of how hard work and dedication play a big role in your success and not so much how "social" you are. People manage the best way they can and I believe they do so by focusing on their strengths and pushing through their challenges and never giving up.

Today I learned that I should continue to work through my challenges and not be afraid of showing off my skills. I have being doing this since returning from my medical leave but I am now willing to take things to the next level. The fact that I received an award at my team meeting for best quality for the month of June did a lot to re-enforce my new found confidence. I am willing to continue to work on improving my ability to participate in team meetings by attending the Brainwaves chapter of Toastmasters and I will be getting more information this Saturday from my support group about Brainwaves. Maybe for my next team meeting I'll be able to sit up a little bit closer to the front of the room, we'll see how it goes.